(F)^3...Free French Fries

I would like to provide you with a rather humorous bedtime story....

Today at work (I work at an optical making eyeglasses for patients) I heard the following conversation, but first, I need to provide some characterization in an unconventional way.

Character #1- An optician who has had a long day yet still managed to put on a smile; protagonist.

Character #2- A woman who is dressed nicely with exceptionally (and unnaturally) smooth skin for her age; antagonist.

Here we go..are you tucked in?

Optician: Hi, Ma'am! How can I help you?

Woman: Well, I'm hoping to get some glasses with this prescription.

Optician: Alright! (takes prescription and looks at it) Now you know ma'am that this prescription is months old, so your eyes might have changed since then?

Woman: Oh yes, but anything will help!

- They both casually spend twenty minutes trying on frames and find a trendy Kate Spade priced at $215-

Optician: Well, now all I need is your insurance card to see what they'll cover for you.

Woman: I don't have insurance.

Optician: No medicare, blueview, or vsp? (the woman shakes her head) Well then the best discount I can give you is 20%. Will you be paying with a credit card?

Woman: (looks oddly at the optician) No.

Optician: oh so then cash or check?

Woman: Neither.

Optician: Well ma'am, how are you planning to pay for these glasses?

Woman: I'm not. I was under the impression that as of yesterday, I have free healthcare. So I won't be paying for these.

I will give you a moment to hide under your covers to either giggle at her insanity or roll your eyes at her..shall i say it?....ignorance.

For her age, though she tried to hide it with a face lift, she should have already found out that there is nothing that is truly free.

I just hope that Obama gives us all free french fries next.....but that wouldn't be very patriotic would it?

hmm.... Free Freedom Fries?! Yes, I would be content then!

Substitution

I vowed to never have a cheesy facebook status about how great my "boyfran" is, yet he needs some recognition after what he has done today.

Here's to you, Ben Nowak, for daring to come over after I have my wisdom teeth taken out.

Here's to you for bringing over chick flicks, knowing that that also entails you watching them.

Here's to you, Mr. Nowak, for poking fun at me in a caring way that makes me laugh.

Here's to you for taking me on my first walk outside all day while I was dizzy and moving in slow motion.

Here's to you for sitting on the couch even though you spent all day yesterday in the car.

Here's to you, sir, for calling me gorgeous even after you saw my chipmunk cheeks.

Here's to you for scratching my back for twenty minutes straight.


Sometimes I wonder what I did to catch your attention....But whatever it was, I am so glad I did! Thank you, Ben! You truly are the best :)

Why, Athleta, do you taunt me so?

It seems to me that everyone has a lifestyle they wish they could live. For some it's a wealthy lifestyle or a more glamorous lifestyle yet others would rather a more intellectual lifestyle. My ideal lifestyle is shown perfectly within the pages of a magazine called Athleta. The company is now owned by Gap and provides cute yoga tops, swimsuits made for athletic figures, and clothes that are leisurely and comfortable.

I can't tell you how much I would love to take that women's place; resting my arms on a hammock and sporting a worn out cowboy hat in the front yard (or would it be the back yard?) of my beach front bungalow.

What really gets me are the incredibly buff figures of these women who are not nineteen-year-old models. Now don't get me wrong, I am very proud of myself for consistently doing yoga and pilates in the mornings and working out in some form every night, yet they are so athletic for their age. Having done yoga in the morning by their crystal clear pools, they put on a sundress to get a chai tea latte with their friends before a ten mile hike.

Why don't they ever show them cleaning their pools? I mean, they all seem like the type of women who would refuse to pay someone to do something so simple. So, they must do it themselves.

That would make a more realistic magazine.

Maybe I am just odd, but I would so rather begin my mornings with this in my own private, outdoor room for yoga instead of going to school and learning about literature that honestly, I don't care for.


I wonder how long she holds this position every morning. Does her face turn really red like mine when I do a handstand for too long?


Just look at that! What woman her age has washboard abs and buff arms like hers? I wonder what she was paddling towards...

Perhaps she was going to pick up her kids from school on her surfboard instead of a stereotypical minivan.


Or maybe she is fishing to provide dinner for her family instead of going to Kroger?


I prefer the story that she is in the process of fixing her boat herself so she improvises with her husband's surfboard and a paddle. Now that is intense....

And these women rarely wear a drop of makeup. They daily sport a natural glow leftover from their 8 mile run that morning on the beach as the sun rose.

If only.......


I would much rather life that life than the life of a student. But I suppose I don't have an option right now. I will continue on with my yoga moves, pilates videos, treadmill runs, and weights........for now!

confusion during second period

I view man as inherently good. Only some are malicious and the behavior derives from past experiences (never from dna)

I view God as compassionate, especially to those who mess up.

There is a gap. What about good people who rarely mess up? Do they automatically have no need for mercy?

I know humanism is wrong. We cannot justify ourselves. But in order to be right, I must begin to realize that humans are inherently bad. That is unsettling. I know it is true. I don’t want to believe it is true. I want to give the benefit of the doubt.

How unsettling.

If we are worse than I believe, that demands God be more that I believe.

That means I need his mercy all the time. That means mother Teresa couldn’t live without his mercy just like Hitler.

That equalizes us. Sounds similar to communism. Takes away any private hope.

Or does it? Maybe it’s not an equalizer. Maybe it’s just a common denominator.

I’m confused and uncomfortable.

So if God is more, how much more?

In younglife, they treat people as inherently good as well. How are they not unsettled by this contradiction? Maybe, I’m just sick to my stomach and this topic is not to blame.

Nope, I feel fine.

I’m laughing. Mrs. Mills sees me laughing. I need to put on a straight face.

I can’t.

I wonder what other people’s motives are? I seem to always assume they mean well. Maybe I shouldn’t have based my beliefs on my assumptions. That’s horrible logic. Mrs. Clark would be ashamed.

But if I thought the motives were bad I would be assuming too.

That was a huge circle. I’m dizzy. But not sick…..blast it. That would be an easy explanation for this.

So the gap came because I assumed too much. Assuming is a habit. A habit can be broken in thirty days. That doesn’t sound very long. I can fix this and go on as a Christian with gapless theology.

Wait, that’s humanism too. I can’t fix this. Because I am human. And we are inherently rebellious. I can’t justify myself.

Blast it. God help me.